New Endorsement: Jack French Kemp!

I've got some great news! 1996 Republican Vice Presidential nominee Jack Kemp is going to be campaigning for me. As Sean Hannity might say, Mr. Kemp is a "Great American", so I am proud to have him on board Team Connecticut For Lieberman. As you can see, his name has been added to my endorsements list on the right side of the blog. I realize that I'm a little behind on adding people to my endorsements list. It's just that there's so many names to add! All the great thinkers of our time. Dick. Newt. Donald. Chris Shays. I can't keep up with them all.

I did learn something interesting, though. Jack's middle name is "French". Now, I thought all conservatives hated France. Hell, I hate France. All this time, from when he was playing Quarterback for the Buffalo Bills to when he was a Republican member of the House of Representatives to when he was running for President as a Republican in 1988, to when he served in the cabinet of Republican President George HW Bush, his middle name was "French". Go figure. Well, we're proud to have Frenchie on board anyway. Thanks for your support, Jack. Merci!

P. S. I always thought that Ned Lamont's middle name should be "French" (it's actually "Miner", named for actress and former Macauly Culkin spouse Rachel Miner).

Pluto Was Robbed

So I hear a bunch of scientists at the International Astronomical Union voted to kick Pluto out of the list of planets. See, that's the first problem. Voting. So what if people voted? Maybe Pluto WANTED to stay a planet. Doesn't anyone care what Pluto wants in all of this? The New Horizons spacecraft will flyby Pluto in 2015. Perhaps we should wait until then to make this decision so we know how the little planet really feels. That's what really matters, not a bunch of elitist voters.

I really empathize with Pluto. We have a lot in common.

They're trying to cancel Joey!

New Haven Independent:

A day after U.S. Sen. Joe Lieberman declared himself a "devoted Democrat" on national TV, peace activists in his hometown of New Haven asked the local registrar of voters Monday afternoon to strip him of his party affiliation because of his third-party reelection bid against party-endorsed Ned Lamont.

Some two dozen activists, camera crews and reporters squeezed into the narrow entry to the second-floor Registrar of Voters office to present their request to Ferrucci. Ferrucci said she wasn't familiar with the law. In a friendly encounter with the surprise crowd in her office, Ferrucci promised, "I will read it and get back to you" within 48 hours or sooner.

The activists cited Section 9-61 of Chapter 143 of the state statutes in their request. That section allows for a Democrat's party affiliation to be "stricken or excluded" for two years if he runs for office as a candidate of a different party.

Peace activists, huh? Someone should take these people out to the parking lot and kick their asses. Nobody cancels Joe Lieberman's membership in the Democratic Party but Joe Lieberman!

P.S. That show "Joey" is really great. It's probably one of the best sitcoms ever! I watch it all the time; it's way better than "Friends" ever was. Better name, too. I hope it stays on the air forever.

CT-SEN Polling Update

After the primary, I kind of felt down in the dumps. I'll admit it. I felt like John Travolta probably did when he was making Look Who's Talking Too. You know, like "Why me?" and "Has my life really sunk this low?"

But then, some new polls were released, and everything changed. I was ahead in every poll! I felt like I was on top of the world once again. I felt like I had made a comeback reminiscent of John Travolta's with Pulp Fiction! Thankfully Hadassah hasn't had any Uma moments with cocaine (yet).

Here's some of the polls released since the primary:

8/9 Rasmussen - Lieberman (I) 46, Lamont (D) 41, Schlesinger (R) 6
8/17 Quinnipiac - Lieberman (I) 53, Lamont (D) 41, Schlesinger (R) 4
8/22 ARG - Lieberman (I) 44, Lamont (D) 42, Schlesinger (R) 3

That last one shows a clear hint of liberal media bias, so it's safe to assume the other two polls are more accurate. Suck on that, Ned Lamont!

Been away, but now I'm back!

Hello, Connecticut For Lieberman supporters!

I know it's been a long time since I rapped at ya, but I sure have been busy since I finished in a two-way tie for first place in the Democratic Primary. As President Bush might say, running for Senate is hard work.

I feel somewhat liberated now that I don't have to kiss the asses of all those slimy liberals any more, and can concentrate on my core supporters. My true friends. My base.

Republicans.

For example, I was on the Glenn Beck show recently, and I didn't even have to pretend that I gave a damn about what the Democrats thought. I could just be myself. My right-wing, war-mongering self.

Now, thankfully the Connecticut Repubs are running gambling addict Alan Schlesinger, who is polling terribly. This leaves me a golden opportunity to vacumn up most of the Republican votes. Along with a majority of independents and non-traitorous Democrats, this means that I will win in November.

It's good to be back.

Greatest Hits

All the recent publicity regarding the Connecticut For Lieberman party combined with the fact that Joe2006.com is STILL down means that I've been getting a lot of new visitors to my blog lately. So I decided to compile a list of my bests posts here on Liebermania as a way of introducing it to a new audience. I'm sure some of you are saying, "Hey Joe, isn't this blog only one month old?" Well, yes it is. But in that one month, I've created more valuable content then the entire liberal blogosphere combined. It's important that I share my best work with as many people as possible. Without further ado:

In Bed With Big Pharma
Why 15-Year-Olds Should KEEP OFF The Internet
Lieberman Goes Hollywood
Homeland Security Busts Bloggers
Flashback: Stickin' Up For Rummy
John McCain Hearts Joe Lieberman
I Kind Of Feel Like A Man-Whore

Ned Lamont Loves Terrorists

"If we just pick up like Ned Lamont wants us to do, get out by a date certain, it will be taken as a tremendous victory by the same people who wanted to blow up these planes in this plot hatched in England. It will strengthen them, and they will strike again.”

- Joe Lieberman

I Fooled Larry King

Last night I was on Larry King on CNN, and he brought up that Godforsaken George W. Bush kiss again. I am SO SICK of that damned kiss! I wasn't going to have any of that shit, so I pretended like I couldn't hear him. Larry totally bought it. You can watch my Academy-Award winning performance here.

THE REAL NED LAMONT

I found this on Flickr. I thought it was quite accurate.

VICTORY!

I've been liberated from the Democratic party! Now it's ALL ABOUT ME.

SAVE ME...GET OUT AND VOTE!

Tell your friends to vote
Get out the vote
Pray

Now I realize most of these links direct you to Lamont's web site. This is only so because Joe2006.com is unreliable, due to an assault by pro-Lamont blogger-hackers. So we're going to leech off their site instead.

Remember, vote for the status quo. DO NOT rock the boat!

I HATE THE INTERNET

First the only other pro-Lieberman blog besides this one, Lieberdem, quit and endorsed Ned Lamont. That was bad enough. Then, my official site, Joe2006.com, shut down because we didn't pay the bill or something. Who knows when it will be back?

I always say, if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself. That's why I have this blog. It's the only page on the 'tubes that you can count on.

NEW POLL: LAMONT 51 LIEBERMAN 45

Don't call it a comeback
I been here for years
Rockin my peers and puttin suckas in fear
Makin blogger tears rain down like a MON-soon
Listen to their skulls go BOOM
Explosion, overpowerin
Over the competition, I'm towerin
Wreckin shop, when I drop these lyrics that'll make you call the cops
Don't you dare stare, you betta move
Don't ever compare
Me to the rest that'll all get sliced and diced
Competition's payin the price

[Chorus:]
I'm gonna knock Ned out (HUUUH!!!)
Mama said knock Ned out (HUUUH!!!)
[Repeat 4x]

I'm cancelling my subscription

NEWSWEEK:


Thanks to the propaganda rag Lamontblog for tipping me off to this story. At least Cokie Roberts still has my back.

Bill Kristol Gave $500 To My Campaign

A Man of Wisdom:

"We have to be ready to use military force against Iran, if it comes to that. Think what this crisis would be like given what we now know about the Islamic Republic of Iran, its regime, its recklessness, its close, close ties to terrorist groups. Think what the world wore would be like with an Iran with nuclear weapons. This is a very interesting moment in that respect. You know? We are in a way lucky that Iran has revealed its aggression, its recklessness, its terror ties before they succeeded in becoming a nuclear power. We have to stop them from getting nuclear weapons. We can try diplomacy. I am not hopeful about that. We have to be ready to use force."

Thanks for the cash, Bill!

Little Brat Deserves A Spanking

My Hero

As everyone knows, a poll came out yesterday that showed me behind Ned Lamont 54-41. Well I'm going to treat that news like all the other bad news I get: I'll completely ignore it. Besides, the poll doesn't even matter any more because of what happened AFTER the poll was taken.

On Wednesday, blogger Jane Hamsher put up an article on the Huffington Post featuring a photoshopped picture of myself and Bill Clinton, with me in blackface. After the Lamont campaign found out about it, they told her to remove the picture, which she did. Then, she wrote an unapologetic apology that basically passed the buck for her actions. If you want to take a look at the photo in question, Jane was kind enough to still leave a copy on her website for everyone to see.

To spend all that time up in Connecticut supporting Ned Lamont, and then to unleash this racist taboo bombshell that totally worked in my favor....wow! I can just imagine the conversation at Lamont HQ:

Tom Swan: Oh my GOD! Jane Hamsher just posted a photo of Lieberman in blackface!
Ned Lamont: Blackface? Are you fucking serious?!?
Tom Swan: Dead serious, boss. This is really going to hurt us.
Ned Lamont: Wow, with friends like these, who needs enemies?
Tom Swan: As your campaign manager, sir, I'd advise you to avoid using lame clichés like that.


Here's what it was like at Lieberman HQ:

Marion Steinfels: Did you see these new poll numbers? We're getting killed here!
Sexy Sean Smith: Wait! Jane Hamsher just posted a blackface pic of you, Joe!
Me: We're saved! Start hammering Lamont with this ASAP.
Sexy Sean Smith: Think she'll want to go out with me? She seems really dumb; we'd have that in common.


No Sean, I don't think she's dumb. You want to know why? Because I don't think this move was unintentional (nobody is THAT stupid). You see, I think Ms. Hamsher actually supports me. See, she used her mad Hollywood skillz to pretend to be a Lamont supporter, and get inside access to the campaign. Then, she posted that vile, disgusting graphic to make Lamont look bad by association. It totally gave me another avenue to attack Ned while avoiding the issues! And I'm not even paying her. She's too old to join the LieberYouth (WAY too old). I'm guessing she did it out of the goodness of her heart.

Let me also give a shoutout to Jane's photoshopping accomplice Darkblack (Darkblack! Haha I get it!). Tales of your handiwork that Jane posted have spread far and wide. Look at some of the media outlets that covered the story:

Stamford Advocate
WTNH
Washington Post
New York Times
Hartford Courant
New York Sun

Wow Jane, you're really making a name for yourself. And all to benefit me. I salute you, Jane Hamsher. You're my hero!

New Endorsement: Tom Delay

Commenter 'Jim in Chicago' let me know that Tom Delay just endorsed me in the primary! He did so on one of my favorite shows, Hannity & Colmes. Here's the video of the endorsement. It's good to see Tom back in the political game. He was planning on retiring, but it looks like the courts aren't going to let him get off the ballot. So he'll run again, he'll win again, and he and I will work together on a bipartisan basis again in the 110th Congress.

I've also added Mr. Delay to my endorsements list. Quite the list of Great Americans that is turning out to be.

Thanks, Tom!

I'm Kookoo for Linky Threads

• Here is my appearance schedule for today. Be sure to meet me at the anti Wal-Mart rally at noon in Bridgeport. But don't tell anyone that I received a $1000 campaign contribution from the company; it's our little secret.
  
  
• The Connecticut For Lieberman campaign fundraiser featuring Mel Gibson has been cancelled.

• Not only is blogger Matt Stoller now stalking me in CT, he's also an image thief. Hey Matt: keep it up and you just might end up in Gitmo with all the other enemies of freedom. All it would take is a phone call. Being friends with George W. Bush has its privileges, you know.

• Last week, political mastermind Mort Kondracke wrote a column in defense of me. It was behind the Roll Call firewall, so non-subscribers couldn't read it. But wait! Somehow the good folks at freerepublic.com have liberated the whole thing. Mort's analysis, much like his toupee, is quite spiffy. I'd like to thank my DC insdier friend Mr. Kondracke and all the Freeper-Americans for their support.

• Ned Lamont has a new commercial out. You can take my word for it; it's not any good. It's just a bunch of people throwing money down a wishing well. What if there were people at the bottom of that well, like in The Goonies? Someone could have been injured by flying currency! Ned Lamont: He doesn't care about the well-being of well-dwellers.